‘Highway to Hell’ Movie Review

Highway to Hell, *** Stars for cheeze

Here’s a lost gem discovered by numerous other Netflix viewers called Highway to Hell (1992). The premise is simple: A couple by the name of Charlie Sykes (Chad Lowe) and Rachel Clark (Kristy Swanson) are eloping to Las Vegas and decide to take a backroad. Unfortunately, they meet up with “Hell Cop” who carries away the bride-to-be since she is a virgin (warning to virgins, you’re a target for vampires, Satan, dragons and various demons. Best to go get laid). Our poor hero Charlie must backtrack to a rundown gas station to get information out of an old geezer who also had his bride stolen. He offers the young man a special car, a special gun and directions on how to find the Highway to Hell, which ends up being a portal that opens up while driving.

Charlie makes it through the portal and into a dry, hot desert filled with lost souls doing everyday monotonous work. There’s a diner from hell where you can’t get any service from the waitress (been there), a construction crew made up of Andy Warhol clones who makes cement out of human bodies, casinos filled with desperate historical villains and ultimately Hell City which is similar in scope to Oz but with Satan instead of a boasting wizard.

The entire film is low-budget cheeze, but it’s good cheeze. There are numerous jokes if you’re fast enough to catch them and several guest appearances by well known (though not necessarily A-list) actors. Ben Stiller and his family play characters like a greasy chef, a diner patron who can’t get a refill, and Attila the Hun. Hitler also appears played by the thoroughly obnoxious Gilbert Gottfried.

If it weren’t for the ending, Christians might be able to view this movie as a humorous allegory.  The reason Hell is “hell” is because of many of the same things we find to be hell on earth: bad service, self-absorbed and annoying people, heavy traffic, and unreasonable cops. I have to note the scene about the heavy traffic: I suspect the reason the traffic is all VW Bugs is because they are Nazi cars. If you don’t already know, it was Hitler who ordered the VW Bug to be designed during World War 2.

There’s enough going on in this B-movie to entertain you for a cheap thrill on a week night and many of the jokes will put a smile on your face. I can’t say there’s much more to it than that, but I do like seeing what people think Hell might look like if it were real.

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