‘The American Bible Challenge’ on The Gameshow Network …Can Atheists Play?

So The Game Show Network (GSN) is launching The American Bible Challenge with host Jeff Foxworthy. …You know, I could have ended the article there as you shake your head.

Okay, actually, I like the idea, generally speaking, but on a commercial channel it’s going to be geared towards a certain type of Christian which means the “Sunday School” version of The Bible and not what actually makes the Bible interesting. In other words, skip the “evil” parts of The Bible.

For example:
Will Jeff Foxworthy ask, “What does this scripture refer to: ‘And they utterly destroyed all that was in the city, both man and woman, both young and old, and ox, and sheep, and ass, with the edge of the sword.’?”
Answer? The Jericho genocide where only a hooker and her family were saved because she betrayed her nation to the Israelite spies. Read more like this at my favorite website EvilBible.com.

What is pretty obvious to anyone is that the show will be geared towards flag-waving Bible thumpers and not amateur Biblical scholars. It’s called The “American” Bible Challenge with emphasis on “American.” I thought the Bible was for everyone worldwide, but apparently it has an “American” bias. They might as well host the show on The Fox Network. You may think I’m being too cynical about the choice of show title here, but think about it. Was “American” slapped on the title to let contestants know that only Americans can play this game? Are people confused by shows like Jeopardy or Wheel of Fortune and need “American” put in front of them so they know that Americans are contestants? Trust me, marketing chose that word carefully.

Historical evidence (pro or con), theology and comparative mythology is likely to be thrown aside for pointless trivia on who beget who, who was married to who, names of enemies and enemy gods, hopefully some geography, The Ten Commandments and an emphasis on stories like Jonah and the whale (or big fish if you prefer), Jesus parables and possibly some end-time porn. If there will be any edginess to the show it will be questions on stories from Samson and Delilah or David and Bathsheba (soap operas).

This is just my prediction from what I’ve read so far. It’s certainly possible that Jeff Foxworthy will expose all the sordid details of The Bible and ask questions like, “In Leviticus, Chapter 20 how many different offenses can you commit that will sentence you to being stoned? No, not that kind of stoned. Ha-ha! I mean stoned to death!”

Unlikely though, this is part of the copy for the call to become a contestant: THE AMERICAN BIBLE CHALLENGE is a studio-based game show in which contestants compete based on their knowledge of the Bible. Questions will be designed to acknowledge and celebrate the Bible’s continuing importance in contemporary life and culture. The contestants will share their compelling back-stories and each team will be playing for a worthy charity.

“Compelling back-stories” refers to testimonies. And celebrating the Bible? Yes, there’s going to be a whole lot of preaching to the choir.

The show is being designed by the creators of Exteme Makeover: Home Edition and the players will win money for their favorite charities. What I would suggest is that atheists submit to be contestants and play for a charity like Dawkins’ Foundation for Reason and Science. As far as I’ve read, they’re not excluding nonChristians from playing so why not? It’s a competition based on knowledge. Ironically, most atheists have read the Bible more than the majority of Christians.

SIDENOTE: Seriously, if you want to be a contestant, here’s the information…

2 thoughts on “‘The American Bible Challenge’ on The Gameshow Network …Can Atheists Play?

  1. I think he had a few church related redneck jokes. If your church collection plate is a hubcap….If the preacher says “Bubba will now take the collection.” and three men and one woman stand up….If deer season is recognized as a church holiday….If the choir robes were donated by Bob’s Barbeque….If people ask what kind of bait Jesus’ apostles used when they went fishing….If you think God looks a lot like Randy Travis….


    If you identify with Jesus cuz your fatherhood is sketchy as well….If you ever wondered why Jesus didn’t turn water into beer….If you identified with Noah’s sons cuz your daddy does stupid shit when he’s drunk too….If you can quietly accept the fact that Biblical characters routinely “kept it in the family” cuz, heck, that’s how your parents met….If you ever considered sacrificing your firstborn son for a pick-up truck….

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